Day 8--Trip to Shenzhen and Orphanage Visit

Today was a good day. Unexpected pleasures and some encouragement. It had some challenges, as they all do, but it was productive all the way around.

The trip to Shenzhen is just over 2 hours. As you travel, you never reach a point where you feel as though you are really in a rural area. It is fairly built up all along the way. Yes, there were some farm type fields, but always amidst buildings, industry, business or homes (mostly apartments).

Arriving at the orphanage, it was obvious that it was familiar to Jadon. When we arrived we were met by a worker and taken upstairs where the classrooms are located. There are over 300 children in this facility and it is fairly self-contained. The kids go to school in the building as well as eat, sleep and play. Jadon's arrival was quite the excitement for his classmates. We were told that he is very much missed. He was pleased to be able to show everyone his new things and especially the pictures of his family. (The picture we placed in his picture book of the house with snow drew gasps from the children who have probably never seen snow.) The kids were very sweet and his teachers seemed like very warm, caring, and enthusiastic individuals. They told us a few things about him, the most interesting piece being that he plays a little bit of piano. Jadon looked for his friend whom he knows as Harrison, but who will be called Drew when he is adopted next week. Drew was upstairs since he has had a little bit of a fever. They want him to be well for when his family arrives early next week. We did get to see him when we arrived to see where Jadon had slept. After visiting the play area, they invited Jadon to go upstairs and say goodbye. He went up, came to the door of the eating area, said goodbye, waved and turned to leave. Overall an encouraging trip.

We then went to find the spot where Jadon was found on November 7, 2005. After getting lost, we finally found the location. He was left outside of what we might call a gated-community. It is perceived by those in the area of being filled with more affluent people. It is most likely that his parents wanted him to be found by someone in this community and thereby be given the potential for a better life. Jadon did not recognize the spot since it has changed so much in the past few years with construction. He obviously remembers something of that time, maybe we will hear about it some day. In the meantime, we trust that God will help him to have a growing confidence in his new position as a member of our family.

Please continue to pray for our communication. Things seem to be getting a little better on both ends. We are picking up some of his phrases and he is picking up some of ours. Pray also for the older two children. Kirsten has an AP European History Exam today for which she has spent a great deal of time preparing. Andrew is struggling with some of the transitions, although overall doing well, he has moments where he feels pretty overwhelmed by his new position and shuts down a bit. Pray that God would help him to know the love that we have for him and the love that He has for him and that Andrew would be settled in the certainty of God as the Rock.

Thanks for sharing the journey with us!! We are starting to really be anxious to get home!!

Day 7-- The Guangzhou Zoo and More Testing

Our day started with an early morning visit to the zoo. We saw a variety of monkeys, bears (including a Panda!), big cats and antelope. The whole trip was very pleasant. Jadon did a great job asking to be able to take pictures and returning the camera when he was done. He actually took a few really nice pictures!

After the zoo we went to a nearby 7-11 to purchase some lunch items for Jadon. While I (Ruth) took Jadon to the room, Alan took Andrew and purchased some lunch for the rest of us at McDonalds (Jadon didn't want McDonalds again although the rest of us had that because the price is right). We ate in the room and after a brief rest wandered down to the pool for a swim. Jadon continues to become less fearful of the water. We spent a couple of very nice hours there.

The boundary testing started in the evening. After confronting him over some items he'd taken without permission from my purse (we'd already dealt with this before) Jadon made a dash to escape from the room. When Alan stopped him a great deal of crying ensued...eventually leading to him pulling his hair and slapping himself. At that point Alan enveloped him in a great big bear hug (whereupon the crying turned to screaming--eek!) But after several minutes he settled down. We called Amy (our Chinese guide in Guangzhou)and let Jadon express his feeling to someone who could understand him. It seems the whole incident frightened him (I understand that...it would me too). As we talked about it later Alan likened this process to justification and sanctification. Jadon has been made part of the family (as justification does) but he still needs to to learn to function as part of the family (a lot like what sanctification accomplishes in our lives). I think the whole thing probably did a lot to solidify the relationship rather than weaken it. Afterwards there were smiles and hugs in abundance.

Continue to pray as we learn the best ways to establish the boundaries with love. Pray that our communication will become more and more effective. It's so very difficult for a couple of communicators to feel as though our best parenting skill has evaporated. Also pray that the trip to the orphanage tomorrow will help to bring us together in a greater way rather than create confusion for Jadon.

Day 6--Applying for Passports and Testing Boundaries

Well, the official business of the day was the application for Jadon's passport at the police station. There are several families who were at the Civil Affairs Office on Gotcha Day whom we run into over and over again in different locations and situations since we are all completing the same steps simultaneously. We get to see how things are progressing at each step of the way. Interestingly, everyone seems to remember Jadon. He is quite the charmer.

After the police station if was off to Pizza Hut. The menu was quite different from what we see in the States. Jadon had never had pizza before and would still never have had it if we didn't "strongly encourage" it.

Other than that it was a day spent together doing lots of different things (watching some borrowed Disney DVDs, playing hide and seek with Jadon's yipping dog, visiting McDonalds for lunch where Jadon talked the staff into giving him 2 toys rather than one, and playing with those toys upon return to the room among other things). As we become a bit more accustomed to one another there are new challenges. We are working on communicating boundaries and expectations and not just treating Jadon as though he is a visitor, since he is now part of the family for life. In our reading to prepare for this time many warned that it would be important for the adopted child to know they are more than a visitor and one way was by communicating appropriate expectations as part of a family. We are realizing that since he is older, we don't have multiple times to experiment to get it right. We need to be on our game from the beginning so things are consistent. Ruth has been a great mom. She has a way about her that amazes me. I (Alan) have been a tad overwhelmed today with the magnitude of the task ahead and with my deep desire to get it right for his sake. The inability to understand his speech is difficult for me especially.

Overall, things are great. Jadon continues to tell us that he is happy. He writes his new English name on his drawings. He continues to constantly share whatever it is that he has. (I have had more gum in the past two days than I have chewed in the past two years.) Tomorrow it is off to the zoo in the morning and on Friday we get to visit the orphanage that has been home to our son for the past 3.5 years. (Our guide explained what we were going to do and asked Jadon if that would be alright--He said that it would be. She told him it would be a chance to show us and to say goodbye. Pray for us on this one. It is a great privilege to even have the option of going, but we want it to help the process.)

Thanks, everyone for your love and support. We are blessed to have so many friends, family, and adoption acquaintances share in this journey. We are all (Jadon included) looking forward to coming home next week. Skype is wonderful thing since we have been able to see and talk with Kirsten everyday. Jadon recognizes her as his big sister and enjoys talking to her.

Video from Gotcha Day--Jadon and Andrew with Matchbox

Since we didn't take the camera places on Tuesday (since if it is there Jadon is all over it all the time) we are posting a brief video from Gotcha Day when he and Andrew were playing with the car. This was literally about 3-4 minutes after we met him.

Day 5--It's Official - Getting to Know Jadon

Today started with another trip back to the Civil Affairs office to complete our appointment/interview with the notary (like a judge here)and a civil affairs officer. Jadon charmed the pants off both of them. The interview questions were simple and over in no time. We signed papers and he became officially our son in the eyes of both the Chinese and the United States governments. Yeah!!!!!!

After our brief appointment we had the rest of the day free. We spent some time in the hotel room doing laundry while Jadon and Andrew played Trouble. Jadon has beaten every single one of us in every game he has played. How can one child pop so many sixes?

When Jadon started going stir crazy we went to McDonald's for lunch and then took a walk to a nearby park. Jadon (as well as the rest of us) thoroughly enjoyed that until Jadon developed a blister on his ankle due to putting his shoes on with no socks. This brought a very dramatic display of anguish from our little guy. After riding on Daddy's shoulders everything was fine again. He has expressed several times that he is "happy."

After some rest upon our return to the hotel we all went down to the pool for a swim. Jadon has demonstrated a love of water as he has asked for a bath both days. The pool was a slightly different story at first. He wasn't sure what to think. As time went by his trust level seemed to grow and grow. He even managed to put his face in the water several times, eventually blowing bubbles. He's even warmed up to Pop Tarts and Goldfish crackers which he vehemently denied at first.

We've been told that it may take up to a week to start to see a child's real personality. I think Jadon wears his on his sleeve generally. He is very friendly, greeting just about everyone we meet. He also seems to love to share. We purchased some chewing gum (jasmine flower flavored, I think) which he has shared with us and others from our travel group...over and over again. He has a very independent streak and knows what he likes. His appetite is good but he hasn't gorged himself at all.

He is still coughing quite a bit so please keep praying for him. Our guide called the orphanage director this morning at our request to find out what was up with him. We were told that he was fine until they brought him to Guangzhou. He was up coughing a bit in the middle of the night last night and coughs even as I am writing this (although I think he's asleep). I am hoping he sleeps better tonight (a lack of sleep is not a good thing when dealing with a child as active as Jadon--although Andrew has been a tremendous help). He was pretty tired and seems a lot more relaxed this evening.

Tomorrow should be another relatively relaxed day. We will apply for Jadon's passport in the afternoon followed by a trip to Pizza Hut, but that's really the only thing on the agenda. Please pray we all sleep well tonight.

Day 4--GOTCHA DAY!!!

How on earth do we begin to describe this day???

Up before 5:30 (couldn't sleep). In the bus by 6 AM. On the plane at 7:30 AM. Arrive in Guangzhou at 11 AM. At the hotel by noon. Leave at 2 to meet the children. We were all pretty nervous, scared, excited, anxious, etc. at this point. All of that seems like a blur. What happened next was amazing.

When we arrived at the Civil Affairs office Amy had us look at our paperwork first to be sure that everything was in order. While Andrew and Alan looked over these items carefully in a room where several other families were waiting, a woman walked in with a young boy. Ruth caught his eye and he saw her with a slight hint of recognition. When the woman and the boy returned, we were called up to meet our son and brother. After about 15 seconds of suspense, the woman with Jadon pointed to Ruth and Jadon said with a grin, "Mama." Things were off and running. He especially enjoyed the matchbox car we brought and spent quite a bit of time sending it back and forth with Andrew. The next exciting toy was Kirsten's camera. He took several pictures (as you can see).

We had a chance to speak with his caregivers and learned several things. 1) He is a very active boy. They laughed and said that he was sometimes naughty. 2) He likes to eat--especially meat and fruit (apples). 3) He has known about the adoption for about 3 months and obviously has seen the picture. He knows who Kirsten is when he sees the picture that we posted in January. He speaks a little bit of English and obviously understands more.

A couple of prayer requests: 1) Jadon has a cough and is obviously not feeling his best. Pray that he will get well quickly and that the rest of us don't pick this up from him (especially Andrew who will share a bed with him while we are here.) 2) We want to learn to communicate with him well. Pray that we would pick up on his expressions and efforts to communicate with us and that we would do a good job communicating with him as well. 3) Pray for Kirsten (man do we miss her) since she can't be here in person.

Andrew has done a great job. What a fantastic big brother!!

Thanks to so many for the prayer that has been lifted on our behalf. God is good and his hand in this is obvious to all of us.

Day 3--Day Before Jadon!!

The day began at an English-speaking church service for internationals. You need to show your ID prior to entering. Lots of good songs with people of all colors from around the world, a message and communion. After this we boarded a bus, went to a Jade factory, and then had lunch. The place we had lunch was the cloisonne factory that we visited four years ago. The lunch menu was packed with lots of food, including Beijing Duck. After lunch, a little bit of shopping and off to the Great Wall. We were fortunate because by the time we arrived at the wall, most of the Chinese tourists had left to go home after the holidays. Andrew climbed up to the third full tower with some others in the group. Then it was dinner and back to the hotel.

The real focus of the group through all of this is tomorrow. On the bus by 6 AM, to the airport for a 2 hour 40 minute flight to Guangzhou, an hour drive to the hotel, some freshening up, and off to the Civil Affairs office to meet Jadon. After all this time it is finally here. It seems surreal. Can't wait!!!

Please be praying for Jadon and for all of us as we meet for the first time. Pray that we would have wisdom to interact in the ways that would be most meaningful and helpful to him, to be sensitive to his needs and swirling emotions. Pray that we might all be effective in our communication. Pray for Andrew since he has shared that he is pretty nervous about this. Thanks everyone for sharing in this process!!