Safety and Security

In the midst of the roller coaster ride we decided to seek out some additional help. Ruth and Alan have had the benefit of some advice that has been very helpful. In the discussion about some of Jadon's adjustments we were reminded about the importance of providing him a sense of safety and security. The suggestion was that we find a job for Jadon that would give him the knowledge that he had an important place in the family. At the beginning of the week we determined that the job would be setting the table for our dinner meal. Andrew has the job of clearing the table and Kirsten has the job of loading the dishwasher. It seems to be accomplishing a little of what was desired.

In addition Jadon was asked to help Andrew clean the basement the other day after tutoring. When he got home, the two boys went at the task and finished it in record time--pretty well also. After that Jadon chose to clean their room as well. We believe that this gave him a sense of control and contribution that is vital to his feelings of safety within the family. It has been fun to watch the two boys do more and more together this week as well.

We now have only a week and a half before school begins. Jadon has made tremendous strides through his tutoring (we are so blessed with such an outstanding teacher). He will start the year a bit behind his second grade classmates, but can certainly catch up. It is our hope that prior to going to school that he will continue to feel more and more a part of the family and know that his home is a place of love, security and comfort. His English is getting better all the time, but he still has a tendency to speak very quickly and if you are not accustomed to his unique pronunciation of several words, he can be very difficult to understand. This is a potential source of frustration for his classmates and for him. We pray that he will not feel defeated in school and thereby come to dislike it.

Please continue to pray for all of us. While things have been better that past few days, we still have much to learn and are very fragile emotionally. Pray that God would continue to grant insight into how to help Jadon know his safe and secure position within our family. Pray that we would continue to see him as a greater part of the family as well. Pray for his preparations for school and that huge adjustment--it has the potential to really rock his world.

Thanks to all of you for your faithful prayer support. It is so incredibly needed. Through this experience we have come to know our extreme dependence on God, but also have come to see the grace that He give to us as His own adopted children. It is amazing how God uses things to show Himself!!

Roller Coasters

The past month has brought with it a slew of new experiences for Jadon and new emotional highs and lows for everyone. A few weeks ago Jadon experienced his first boat ride (as far as we know)...on the Mississippi, no less, thanks to Ruth's sister Sharon and her husband Mike. He even braved the cold waters for a quick dip with Uncle Mike a bit downstream of the Dresbach dam. He also got to take in part of a baseball game to watch the Eau Claire Express play. Unfortunately we got rained out that night and had to leave early. But he did get to experience cotton candy for the first time!

He's grown a great deal, both physically and intellectually. His English is quite a bit better. He uses it almost exclusively now (although when he talks fast it sounds more like Chinese!!). He is beginning to learn the importance of using final consonants since it makes all the difference in what some words mean. One day he asked Alan very nicely if he could please have "ay." Alan responded by saying, "Go fish" (since we had been regularly playing a go fish game with letters). We learned from some hand gestures that he had actually wanted an "egg" to eat. We still have these problems, but it is improving.

While things have been improving on this front there are some struggles that we face in the process of establishing boundaries, appropriate behaviors, and relationships. Emotionally, we are all very tired. Jadon seems to be testing boundaries with more regularity now that he has some understanding of home and options around home. With the limitations of the language still upon us this is very challenging since we do not always know if he understands our explanations. It appears to us that Jadon was used to being top dog in his orphanage setting and that he still struggles with being the little brother. His relationships with Kirsten and Andrew run hot and cold at times. He is still a bit clingy to Alan and this creates difficulty for all of us.

Please pray for some emotional equilibrium and stability for all five of us. Pray that Jadon would come to know safety and stability within the family and that his appreciation would be for all the relationships. Pray also for the transition back into the school year. Alan will be back at work pretty full-time next week and the kids go back on September 2.

Among some of the other highlights of the past month are: 1) Kirsten is now a licensed driver. She passed her test the very first time and does a very good job. She has taken the boys a couple of different places and it has been great for her to have that freedom. 2) One week in July Andrew was able to attend a junior high basketball camp at Camp Forest Springs. He really enjoyed it a great deal and felt that God really challenged him and met him there. 3) That same week in July Kirsten spent in Mississippi on a youth group missions trip. She enjoyed being with the people and having the opportunity to go to New Orleans and see so much French. 4) Andrew had the opportunity to go to Hayward for a week with his best friend Jake. Jake and his family have been such a huge blessing to all of us, but especially to Andrew. His time there is definitely a highlight of his summer.

Thanks for your support and hanging in there with us. We covet your prayers and assistance as we seek to learn to be the family God intends us to be. Blessings to you all.