We finally made it out of school. Jadon's last couple of weeks of school were relatively uneventful (a major accomplishment, especially with so many unstructured events happening). I (Ruth) credit the Lord with this accomplishment. I was talking with one of the teachers one day and she mentioned that Jadon just seems so reactionary. That got my brain whirling. I wondered if his constant going a mile a minute and talking so fast and his erratic behavior might all be related. I set him down and suggested that what he really needed to concentrate on was slowing down and thinking. He told me later that worked. So we were very happy with the way school ended. Andrew and Kirsten finished without much fanfare as well.
Heading into summer we were initially very busy with baseball games. Andrews team improved steadily throughout the season (as did Andrew). They nearly made it into the championship game of the tournament...held back by some very questionable umping. They won their consolation game by a landslide. We all cheered frantically. It was both relaxing and a ton of fun. Andrew had a couple of huge hits that would have been home runs inside their home field park. It was a nice end to the season. Andrews slow start kept him off the all-star team but he was pleased where he wound up, nevertheless.
I entered into some summer homeschooling with Jadon. I have new respect for homeschool moms. But we are making progress. Jadon's reading seems to be improving...although not as fast as I would like. I just want him to catch up with his class. He's been a trooper though and puts up with my tendency to push. He's even started doing some reading comprehension exercises and although he balked at them initially he seems to be getting the hang of it. I know this will be of tremendous assistance when it comes to taking the 3rd grade WKCE test in October.
Currently Jadon is taking swimming lessons. So far so good. Alan has taken him to give me a little down time (which I appreciate tremendously!!!). Jadon loves the water and has done a fairly good job listening to the instructor. Hopefully this is a big step in the right direction. I know that swimming lessons don't provide a lot of structure. Jadon has had the hardest time adapting to unstructured circumstances. He's not done yet...but I'm hopeful.
We've also tried him at the neighborhood playground program at one of the local parks. That has met mixed reviews (even less structured than swimming lessons) but we're hoping that by the end of the summer his relational skills will have improved and he will have gotten much better at adapting to changing routines.
It's really been a pretty big summer so far. We've had one "family" wedding to start the summer, Alan sang in a second while Andrew, Jadon and I vistited good friends living in Kohler we met in China last year. (Imagine going all the way to China to meet a family living four hours from us!!!) That was a wonderful weekend and we all came home refreshed. This weekend we have my uncle's 80th birthday celebration and my parents are having their 50th wedding anniversary celebration a couple weeks after that...lots of preparation before that happens! Then we're capping off the summer with another wedding...the biggest!! Alan's sister has finally met someone worthy of her! We're so excited. Everyone is going to have a part. We'll have to let everyone know how that goes.
Kirsten comes home from France tomorrow. It's been very strange not having her around for two weeks. I've missed her terribly and can't wait for her to come home. Everyone (except Jadon who will stay with a babysitter for the first time) is going to Minneapolis to meet her flight. We can't wait. There will be stories, I've been told and lots of pictures to view. I guess her time away has been a preview to what I'm looking at a year from now. It doesn't seem possible that my baby is now a senior in high school...which reminds me...Karen, we need to talk about senior pics!
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
Gotcha Day...one year later
Okay...as usual I'm a little late. "Gotcha Day," the day we met and brought Jadon into our family is actually May 4. The day itself was pretty laid back as far as celebrating goes. I had to work, giving voice lessons all day and Alan was in the Twin Cities. We celebrated as a family this past weekend by going to Mall of America in Bloomington, MN and letting the kids ride the amusement park rides there. Jadon got off his first ride (the ferris wheel) and declared this the "best present ever!" After several hours we left to have dinner at Lucky China on Robert Street in West St. Paul by recommendation of our friend Barb Pentecost. The food was by far the best Chinese food with have had in the states. None of us left feeling as though we'd ever had a better egg roll too. Alan's parents and his sister, Paula and her fiancé, Greg joined us in this celebration as well. A good time was had by all.
As we look back over the last year it is so amazing to review everything we have come through. Now that we are a year away from it we can recognize that the difficulties we encountered in Guangzhou those ten days there with Jadon were probably due mostly to fear (by all of us)--though we couldn't see it at the time. We really weren't prepared for the effect it would have on the existing relationships. We knew there would be challenges but we weren't prepared for the types of challenges that we would face. We expected some delayed development and were prepared to re-work through some developmental stages with Jadon. What we weren't prepared for was the dramatic fashion these played out or the frequency of what we now consider regression. This is by far the most challenging thing any of us have ever done.
But it is also one of the most rewarding things as well. We are seeing Jadon mastering the language (though he's not there yet he has come so far). While he did not know the alphabet a year ago he now can read quite a number of children's books with very little difficulty. His desire for this seems to grow at a more and more rapid rate all the time. School has been an adventure for Jadon, us, and the school personnel. Overall, he has benefited tremendously from all the care, concern, and hard work they have put in. His ELL teacher is truly a gift to him and to us. She has been more than tremendous.
The relationships with the family continue to grow. He regularly shows his affection to each of us, sometimes in unique ways. He and Andrew have lots of adventures and some real brother moments. There are occasionally some rapids to navigate, but that is normal with brothers. He has grown in his connection to his sister, but we see the biggest change in his connection to me. We continue to work on trust so he feels safe sharing his feelings--there is a way to go there since he has blocked them for so long, but he is making progress.
We returned home one year ago today. My what a difference a year makes. We have been blessed by Jadon's presence in our lives (it came with many challenges, and still does). God is working in all of us and we are so thankful.
As we look back over the last year it is so amazing to review everything we have come through. Now that we are a year away from it we can recognize that the difficulties we encountered in Guangzhou those ten days there with Jadon were probably due mostly to fear (by all of us)--though we couldn't see it at the time. We really weren't prepared for the effect it would have on the existing relationships. We knew there would be challenges but we weren't prepared for the types of challenges that we would face. We expected some delayed development and were prepared to re-work through some developmental stages with Jadon. What we weren't prepared for was the dramatic fashion these played out or the frequency of what we now consider regression. This is by far the most challenging thing any of us have ever done.
But it is also one of the most rewarding things as well. We are seeing Jadon mastering the language (though he's not there yet he has come so far). While he did not know the alphabet a year ago he now can read quite a number of children's books with very little difficulty. His desire for this seems to grow at a more and more rapid rate all the time. School has been an adventure for Jadon, us, and the school personnel. Overall, he has benefited tremendously from all the care, concern, and hard work they have put in. His ELL teacher is truly a gift to him and to us. She has been more than tremendous.
The relationships with the family continue to grow. He regularly shows his affection to each of us, sometimes in unique ways. He and Andrew have lots of adventures and some real brother moments. There are occasionally some rapids to navigate, but that is normal with brothers. He has grown in his connection to his sister, but we see the biggest change in his connection to me. We continue to work on trust so he feels safe sharing his feelings--there is a way to go there since he has blocked them for so long, but he is making progress.
We returned home one year ago today. My what a difference a year makes. We have been blessed by Jadon's presence in our lives (it came with many challenges, and still does). God is working in all of us and we are so thankful.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
It's been a long time
Wow. When I (Ruth) opened our blog for the first time in forever I saw that our last post was Thanksgiving. Yikes. I get an "F" in blogging. I suppose that shouldn't surprise me...I've never been good at journaling. I take writing more seriously than I need to so rather than just expressing myself I will write and rewrite and re-rewrite and re-re-rewrite...you get the picture. I've thought about this off and on for quite some time so here goes...
A lot has changed since November. We experienced a major holiday and two minor holidays since then. That is significant because Jadon has this fear of being left out of events. The week before Christmas he was a bear at school and lost privileges along the way. He wasn't quite so bad at home but was a lot more edgy than what we had come to accept as normal. He was terrified that everyone in the family would get presents but him. He was also very fearful of sleeping in the basement with his brother. (I guess that doesn't surprise me too much though. Basements aren't my favorite either and Andrew still leaves all the lights in the entire basement on when he's down there alone.) He kept thinking he was seeing ghosts (I think partly because he saw Disney's The Princess and the Frog). We learned the hard way that he doesn't clearly see the difference between fiction and reality as our older two did. Needless to say, Christmas morning was a hoot (even though it started at around 4:30 for Andrew and Jadon--to their credit they didn't wake us up until around 7)! He couldn't hardly believe all the presents he received.
We thought things would settle down after Christmas. Although we celebrated with my family right after New Year's he wasn't told about presents there until it happened. The anticipation wasn't there. What we failed to forget was that Jadon had been invited to a birthday party the day before school started again. He was a nervous wreck having never been to a birthday party before. But he did great. (Of course it was a pool party and he loves the water.)
Shortly after Christmas we decided it was time to separate the two boys and give them their own rooms. Tensions had escalated before Christmas and once Jadon got home with all his new loot he was a possessive bear, making life miserable for Andrew. Andrew especially has been happy with the new arrangement (and his queen size bed!). He's even managed to make his bed almost every day as requested. (I'm quite proud of him for that one.) Jadon has adjusted well and likes his own room for the most part. He has mentioned several times that he'd like to go back to the way things were...not on your life!
Then came Valentine's Day. We didn't mention anything before notice came home from school. Then we had to go to the store and buy the valentines that very night. A few days before his party he again started acting out terribly. When I questioned him he admitted that he was afraid nobody would give him any valentines. I assured him that wouldn't happen but trust levels still aren't where I hope they'll be next year at this time (or even now, for that matter) and the acting out continued. He came home from school the day of his party very pleased with all the valentines and candy he received which begged the question, "Now Mommy was right, wasn't I?" He sheepishly had to agree. Things have actually been a little better in the trust department since that time.
Which brings us to the present day. His winter report card came home yesterday. Academically he's showing some significant progress. He even got a "4" in music for his ability to sing a 3-note song (meaning he is exceeding the end of the year standard for second graders). It only seems right I guess. God put him in the right family. The area that still needs improvement is in his behavior. While he's shown considerable progress in understanding what is appropriate behavior in school he is very inconsistent and frequently needs reminders about what is appropriate. We've decided that his "toddler" mindset of the world revolving around just him and nobody else mattering needs to have some enlightenment. It's a tough balancing act so pray that God gives wisdom in how we go about this. So far, so good. The report today was that he had a great day at school. Yeah!!!
Now, since the Rieck family consists of Alan, Ruth, Kirsten and Andrew as well as Jadon it seems only right to include an update of our lives as well.
Alan is currently taking administrative classes at Hamline University while he is on sabbatical. He is extremely busy with his observations for his sabbatical project as well as taking 12 credits. But Mr. I-love-to-go-to-school seems to be handling everything fairly well. The information he's been gleaning from one of his classes is even helping us on the communication front...always a good thing!
As a junior Kirsten gets at least 10 informational college brochures every week. She's starting to consider her options. She currently works at Fazoli's but is hoping to find a position that will give her more hours. She has an interview next week after turning in an application last night so she is hopeful.
Andrew is taking trombone lessons now along with piano. He seems to be excelling which is fun for two musical parents. He's starting to settle more into the middle school expectations and has had fewer anxiety attacks regarding his schoolwork and tests recently. He's been doing very well, getting A's in most of his classes.
And I am busy two full days a week with voice students. I currently have 12 students which can be a bit draining since many of them are young and require a bit more energy from me. God has also been opening my eyes to sin in my own life in the most unexpected ways. I can't say it's been a lot of fun, but I am grateful that He is showing me where I am in need of continued growth.
Above all, the last few months have started to bring all of us into a new equilibrium which had been way out of whack when Jadon first came home. I'm sure we'll continue to need adjusting, but for now...life is good. Praise the Lord!!
A lot has changed since November. We experienced a major holiday and two minor holidays since then. That is significant because Jadon has this fear of being left out of events. The week before Christmas he was a bear at school and lost privileges along the way. He wasn't quite so bad at home but was a lot more edgy than what we had come to accept as normal. He was terrified that everyone in the family would get presents but him. He was also very fearful of sleeping in the basement with his brother. (I guess that doesn't surprise me too much though. Basements aren't my favorite either and Andrew still leaves all the lights in the entire basement on when he's down there alone.) He kept thinking he was seeing ghosts (I think partly because he saw Disney's The Princess and the Frog). We learned the hard way that he doesn't clearly see the difference between fiction and reality as our older two did. Needless to say, Christmas morning was a hoot (even though it started at around 4:30 for Andrew and Jadon--to their credit they didn't wake us up until around 7)! He couldn't hardly believe all the presents he received.
We thought things would settle down after Christmas. Although we celebrated with my family right after New Year's he wasn't told about presents there until it happened. The anticipation wasn't there. What we failed to forget was that Jadon had been invited to a birthday party the day before school started again. He was a nervous wreck having never been to a birthday party before. But he did great. (Of course it was a pool party and he loves the water.)
Shortly after Christmas we decided it was time to separate the two boys and give them their own rooms. Tensions had escalated before Christmas and once Jadon got home with all his new loot he was a possessive bear, making life miserable for Andrew. Andrew especially has been happy with the new arrangement (and his queen size bed!). He's even managed to make his bed almost every day as requested. (I'm quite proud of him for that one.) Jadon has adjusted well and likes his own room for the most part. He has mentioned several times that he'd like to go back to the way things were...not on your life!
Then came Valentine's Day. We didn't mention anything before notice came home from school. Then we had to go to the store and buy the valentines that very night. A few days before his party he again started acting out terribly. When I questioned him he admitted that he was afraid nobody would give him any valentines. I assured him that wouldn't happen but trust levels still aren't where I hope they'll be next year at this time (or even now, for that matter) and the acting out continued. He came home from school the day of his party very pleased with all the valentines and candy he received which begged the question, "Now Mommy was right, wasn't I?" He sheepishly had to agree. Things have actually been a little better in the trust department since that time.
Which brings us to the present day. His winter report card came home yesterday. Academically he's showing some significant progress. He even got a "4" in music for his ability to sing a 3-note song (meaning he is exceeding the end of the year standard for second graders). It only seems right I guess. God put him in the right family. The area that still needs improvement is in his behavior. While he's shown considerable progress in understanding what is appropriate behavior in school he is very inconsistent and frequently needs reminders about what is appropriate. We've decided that his "toddler" mindset of the world revolving around just him and nobody else mattering needs to have some enlightenment. It's a tough balancing act so pray that God gives wisdom in how we go about this. So far, so good. The report today was that he had a great day at school. Yeah!!!
Now, since the Rieck family consists of Alan, Ruth, Kirsten and Andrew as well as Jadon it seems only right to include an update of our lives as well.
Alan is currently taking administrative classes at Hamline University while he is on sabbatical. He is extremely busy with his observations for his sabbatical project as well as taking 12 credits. But Mr. I-love-to-go-to-school seems to be handling everything fairly well. The information he's been gleaning from one of his classes is even helping us on the communication front...always a good thing!
As a junior Kirsten gets at least 10 informational college brochures every week. She's starting to consider her options. She currently works at Fazoli's but is hoping to find a position that will give her more hours. She has an interview next week after turning in an application last night so she is hopeful.
Andrew is taking trombone lessons now along with piano. He seems to be excelling which is fun for two musical parents. He's starting to settle more into the middle school expectations and has had fewer anxiety attacks regarding his schoolwork and tests recently. He's been doing very well, getting A's in most of his classes.
And I am busy two full days a week with voice students. I currently have 12 students which can be a bit draining since many of them are young and require a bit more energy from me. God has also been opening my eyes to sin in my own life in the most unexpected ways. I can't say it's been a lot of fun, but I am grateful that He is showing me where I am in need of continued growth.
Above all, the last few months have started to bring all of us into a new equilibrium which had been way out of whack when Jadon first came home. I'm sure we'll continue to need adjusting, but for now...life is good. Praise the Lord!!
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